1. The steroids you take after surgery make your face puffy and you get sad thinking you look fat (even though you’re not). The steroids also make you uncontrollably emotional as if you’re experiencing PMS for two weeks.
  2. Even when you are happy, it hurts to smile, so you don’t, and that makes your friends think you’re sad.
  3. Pain medication makes you constipated. ‘Nuff said.
  4. You won’t remember all the nice things people say to you during the following two weeks.
  5. It is hard to get comfortable during sleep … which is all you’re supposed to do.